Life Inside Panic

My theory on men in love

Ok, so lets get this out right up front. I am a newly single, 29yo, somewhat bitter woman. I do NOT hate all men; in fact after this last breakup I have given it a great deal of thought and actually feel some compassion for you. I am convinced that there is some sort of biological reaction that happens between oxytocin (the hormone that is released when we are in love) and testosterone. It must cause a kind of temporary insanity and because you guys have tons more testosterone… Well you do the math.
They have proven that positive thinking can be as effective, sometimes more effective, in patients with depression and anxiety disorders (both chemical). The patient is taught to examine their thought process and try to look at things in a more uplifting way so they don’t have a negative emotional response. If this works for them then it must work for you as well. I am going to point out what I feel are the four most common forms of delusion that this particular type of mental illness seems to cause in the hope that perhaps a couple guys out there will remember this and try the positive thinking technique until I can get a grant to do medical research and develop a drug to treat this condition.
1. Biological Clock
Lets get this one right off the bat. I understand that you all think that you are the perfect male specimen and that we are chasing you around with this ticking noise in our heads, dieing for you to impregnate us. Not the case. If we love you and are planning a future together, especially talking about marriage, then children will eventually come up. Do not allow yourself to spiral into paranoid delusions of us trying to trap you with a baby. Either talk about it and relax or say you aren’t sure how you feel about having kids and that you’d like to think about it. Picking out baby names and suddenly having unprotected sex leads us to believe we are on the same page, it does not mean we are crazy and trying to trick you into fatherhood.
2. Male Friends
Guys, again I implore you to control the voices in your head. I can’t count the number of my ex’s who have given me the “men and women can’t just be friends and if your ex is still talking to you it’s because he wants something” lecture. Followed by a jealous declaration that I need to choose between the relationship I’m in or friends who happen to have a Y chromosome. This also helps to prove that it is a temporary condition caused by a reaction to hormones because the majority of those guys now feel it is perfectly acceptable to remain friends with a female once they are not in love any longer. My current ex even feels that we should be roommates, because “we still care about each other as people” and he “really doesn’t want us not to live together” and we now have a completely platonic relationship. A year ago however, I made a phone call in the middle of the night to a friend that I had a past relationship with to tell him I could not talk to him any longer. This was done with my ex sitting right next to me angry about a late night text from this friend who happens to work nights. Before you freak remember, once this hormone is not screwing with your mental balance, you might actually want to maintain a friendship with us. There was obviously enough you liked about us to make you fall in love. And honestly, have you never had a friend of the opposite sex that was a platonic relationship or you dated and just didn’t match but still enjoyed each others company?
3. Cheating
This is the one that I think is caused by the least amount of testosterone because both men and women suffer with this. If your partner goes to the store, friends house, families house, or just doesn’t pick up the phone because they have fallen asleep early; it does NOT mean they are cheating. This one can spin out of control quickly so before you become hysterical or fly into a vindictive rage, stop and think. The last time you ran to the store and it took longer than expected was it because you were being mounted in the bathroom by a cashier that you found irresistible or were the lines just long? When you went out with your friends, did you come home late because you were caught up in conversation or because you secretly met up with your ex for a steamy quicky? And of course, you can not honestly tell me you have never been so exhausted you just fell asleep. If right now you are getting all indignant and thinking that’s exactly the case then the problem is not with the person you are with but with you. and that brings us to the last one.
4. All Women Are Crazy/Evil
Boys, boys, boys. Ever heard that question “does a crazy person know they are crazy”? It comes from the fact that people in delusional states see their version of events as reality even if the rest of the world does not. Hence the whole “it’s them not me” logic. So, I really want you to try hard with this one. Repeat to yourself that it is not mathematically possible for every person who you have been with to have been nuts. It just doesn’t add up. I know a couple crazy girls so they are definitely out there but I know many more wonderfully sane (albeit confused by your lack of logic and reason) women.
So, please guys, I beg you to open your eyes and see past your little delusional bubble so that we all might find a little happiness. If clinically depressed, suicidal patients can do it I know you can too.

Popularity: 32% [?]

“What causes depression in women?
Source: Daily Graphic

Everyone occasionally feels blue or sad, but these feelings are usually fleeting and pass within a couple of days.

When a woman has a depressive disorder, it interferes with daily life and normal functioning, and causes pain for both the woman with the disorder and those who care about her. Depression is a common but serious illness, and most who have it need treatment to get better.

Depression affects both men and women, but more women than men are likely to be diagnosed with depression in any given year.

Efforts to explain this difference are ongoing, as researchers explore certain factors (biological, social, etc.) that are unique to women.

What are the basic symptoms of depression?

Women with depressive illnesses do not all experience the same symptoms. In addition, the severity and frequency of symptoms, and how long they last, will vary depending on the individual and her particular illness.

Symptoms of depression include: Persistent sad, anxious or “empty” feelings.

Feelings of hopelessness and/or pessimism, irritability, restlessness, anxiety, feelings of guilt, worthlessness and/or helplessness. Loss of interest in activities or hobbies once pleasurable, including sex.

Fatigue and decreased energy, difficulty concentrating, remembering details and making decisions. Insomnia, waking up during the night, or excessive sleeping.

Overeating, or appetite loss, thoughts of suicide, suicide attempts.

Persistent aches or pains, headaches, cramps or digestive problems that do not ease even with treatment.

What causes depression in women? Scientists are examining many potential causes for and contributing factors to women’s increased risk for depression. It is likely that genetic, biological, chemical, hormonal, environmental, psychological, and social factors all intersect to contribute to depression.

Genetics

If a woman has a family history of depression, she may be more at risk of developing the illness. However, this is not a hard and fast rule.

Depression can occur in women without family histories of depression, and women from families with a history of depression may not develop depression themselves.

Genetics research indicates that the risk for developing depression likely involves the combination of multiple genes with environmental or other factors.

Chemicals and hormones

Brain chemistry appears to be a significant factor in depressive disorders. Modem brain imaging technologies, such as magnetic resonance imaging (MRI), have shown that the brains of people suffering from depression look different than those of people without depression.

The parts of the brain responsible for regulating mood, thinking, sleep, appetite and behaviour don’t appear to be functioning normally.

In addition, important neurotransmitters chemicals that brain cells use to communicate  appear to be out of balance. But these images do not reveal WHY the depression has occurred.

Scientists are also studying the influence of female hormones, which change throughout life. Researchers have shown that hormones directly affect the brain chemistry that controls emotions and mood.

Specific times during a woman’s life are of particular interest, including puberty; the times before menstrual periods; before, during, and just after pregnancy (postpartum); and just prior to and during menopause (perimenopause).

Premenstrual dysphoric disorder

Some women may be susceptible to a severe form of premenstrual syndrome called premenstrual dysphoric disorder (PMDD).

Women affected by PMDD typically experience depression, anxiety, irritability and mood swings the week before menstruation, in such a way that interferes with their normal functioning.

Women with debilitating PMDD do not necessarily have unusual hormone changes, but they do have different responses to these changes. They may also have a history of other mood disorders and differences in brain chemistry that cause them to be more sensitive to menstruation related hormone changes.

Scientists are exploring how the cyclical rise and fall of oestrogen and other hormones may affect the brain chemistry that is associated with depressive illness.

Postpartum depression

Women are particularly vulnerable to depression after giving birth, when hormonal and physical changes and the new responsibility of caring for a newborn can be overwhelming.

Many new mothers experience a brief episode of mild mood changes known as the “baby blues,” but some will suffer from postpartum depression, a much more serious condition that requires active treatment and emotional support for the new mother.
One study found that postpartum women are at an increased risk for several mental disorders, including depression, for several months after childbirth.

Some studies suggest that women who experience postpartum depression often have had prior depressive episodes.

Some experience it during their pregnancies, but it often goes undetected. Research suggests that visits to the doctor may be good opportunities for screening for depression both during pregnancy and in the postpartum period.

Menopause

Hormonal changes increase during the transition between premenopause to menopause. While some women may transition into menopause without any problems with mood, others experience an increased risk for depression. This seems to occur even among women without a history of depression. However, depression becomes less common for women during the postmenopause period.

Stress

Stressful life events such as trauma, loss of a loved one, a difficult relationship or any stressful situation, whether welcome or unwelcome, often occur before a depressive episode. Additional work and home responsibilities, caring for children and ageing parents, abuse, and poverty also may trigger a depressive episode.

Evidence suggests that women respond differently than men to these events, making them more prone to depression. In fact, research indicates that women respond in such a way that prolongs their feelings of stress more so than men, increasing the risk for depression.
However, it is unclear why some women faced with enormous challenges develop depression, and some with similar challenges do not.”

Popularity: 69% [?]