Deciding on a mental health professional is confusing and challenging. For most, by the time they contact someone they have exhausted all their other options for symptom relief and emotional support. People do not make major purchases without first doing their research and the same should be true when looking for mental health treatment. Here are some tips to help you make the best decision for you.
Always follow your instincts. If you Doctor/Therapist makes you uncomfortable, acknowledge this. It is important to find someone you can trust and feel comfortable sharing your thoughts and feelings with. A therapist should never pass judgement on you for what you are confiding. They should always treat you with compassion, respect, and acceptance. Your provider should never belittle or make fun of you. The two of you can laugh together about something, but you should never feel as though you are being laughed at. This will create an enviroment where you will be able to be open and confront issues you might not be comfortable discussing with anyone else.
Most importantly, your provider should never touch you in a sexual manner. Any contact that makes you uneasy should be pointed out immediately. This is not to say that a provider should never have any physical contact with a patient; a reassuring sqeeze of your shoulder, holding your hand during a hard session, or hugging you as you leave are acceptable as long as it does not make you feel uncomfortable. The provider should understand and respect boundries, both yours personally and those implied by the nature of the provider/patient relationship. Fondling, sitting on the Therapist’s lap, kissing, or sex of any type is always completely inappropriate.
There are certain rights that all patients have. You have the right to ask any questions related to your treatment. This includes knowing what diagnosis the Therapist is assigning you and what is being filed through your insurance claims. You also have the right to look at the records being kept by your provider regarding your treatment. You may request a copy of these records, but be aware that there may be a fee for copying them. This important to keep track of as insurance companies are famous for using a “preexisting condition” as a reason for denial. You may also refuse to answer any questions. The therapy is to help you but this has to happen at a rate that you are comfortable with. You should never feel pressured into answering questions on subjects that you are not ready to discuss. Do understand, however, that you will have to be willing to face some hard truths about yourself and your life and to do this you will at some point probably have to talk about things that are very difficult for you. This is why the trust issue is so very important with any Doctor or Therapist.
The provider should be able to give you the estimated length of time you will need treatment.This will not be an ironclad timeframe; no Therapist should ever give a guaranteed recovery date. Treatment is different for everyone and how you respond is not something the provider will be able to predict. There is no set formula, this is not a two week course of antibiotics that will erase all symptoms. Some people will begin to notice changes within a few sessions and others will take months or even years. Be prepared to commit to the process and do whatever is neccessary to feel better and you will get the most out of your treatment. If you go in half-hearted and refuse to embrace the process you will be wasting both your time and that of the provider.
You wouldn’t go to a doctor who was not licensed and the same should be true of your mental health provider. Licenses can include a psychologist (PhD), psychiatrist (MD), licensed professional counselor (LPC), licensed social worker (LCSW), or licensed mental health counselor (LMHC). These professionals are required to take a test and are supervised for a specific number of hours providing therapy before they can even take these tests. Seeking help from someone who does not know what they are doing will only create more problems for you.
Often when you feel you don’t want to go to therapy is when you need to go the most. This tends to happen when you are avoiding confronting or dealing with a painful issue. Therapy is hard work and sometimes can be a emotionally painful and draining process. During the first sessions, it is not uncommon to feel worse before you begin feel better. You are dealing with issues and emotions that you might not have ever discussed before or maybe are not even conciously aware that you have. This is why people give up before the process has a chance to work. Think of it like pulling out a splinter; the splinter hurts and can become infected if not treated. Pulling it out can be a painful process in itsself but once it is out you feel so much better. Therapy works the same way. It takes a great deal of strength and courage to share your thoughts, feelings, and issues with a stranger, even a professional. The more open you are with yourself and your provider, the more effective the treatment will be.
The provider is bound under confidentiality laws to never share anything you say in therapy with another person. (Exceptions to this include if the provider feels you are suicidal, a threat to a child or elderly person, or if you might pose a threat to someone else’s life.) The provider should not be on the phone while you are in session or talk to friends or family, yours or theirs, about you without expressed consent from you to do so.
Always remember that no matter who you decide to talk with or what form of therapy you decide to try, that there is always hope. Healing can be a long and difficult process but in the end you will come out of it happier, healthier, and stronger.
